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THINK YOU'REFUNNY?

WHAT’S YOUR MUTANT SUPER POWER?

I believe everyone has a mutant super power. Something they excel at beyond most others. Possibly you think you don’t have one, but you do. You just need to think. That doesn’t necessarily mean that your power is any good. Adrian Peterson’s (of my beloved Minnesota Vikings) super power is running a football like a madman, but you’re super power might be peeling an orange like a madman. Peterson is Purple Jesus. You’d be The Peeler. Like I said, your power isn’t inherently cool. But don’t let it get you down. Rock what ya got, man. Me? I have two mutant super powers. 1.) I am amazing at recognizing actors. Which is totally worthless unless I’m trying to win a bet, or I decide to become a paparazzo. More often than not it’s a little embarrassing when my power is activated. I feel it gives the false impression that I’m obsessed with celebrities. Alas, despite my protestations, I fear my X-Men moniker would be Starfucker. 2.) I have an uncanny ability to find money on the ground. Not just loose change, but paper money. Sometimes twenty-dollar bills. I’m told it is enraging to be with me when it happens. This lets me know it’s a quality super power. I’d say my X-Men name would be Lucky Duck. Though that may have already been a character on “Disney’s Ducktales.”

Unfortunately, while my money-finding power is great when it happens, it's not like I can make the money appear whenever I want it (now that would be an awesome power). Someone needs to drop it first. I can’t exactly support myself with my mutant super power like Purple Jesus can. And of course, neither of these powers allows me to fight crime. Once when my friend and I were going to see a movie, I found $20 on the ground and paid for both our tickets. That's about as close as either super power has brought me to heroism. So that’s me. Now I turn things over to you, handsome reader. Please, share on our comment board: What’s your mutant super power, and what would your superhero name be?

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MADATOMS is an alt-comedy network focused on videos, articles and comics. We post daily videos, ranging from breakout virals to auteur driven shorts.

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