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RETARD ROMANCE

Dear Hollywood Execs, I get it, you’re equal opportunity whores and so am I, but do me a favor and stop making movies and television shows with the mentally handicapped boning down. When I was a kid I happened to watch Life Goes On and they let two 'tards fuck and then have a baby. A BABY. I’m not saying that retards do not deserve a baby, but seriously, get real. The last thing I need is retard sex embedded into my psyche forever. Too bad after the whole Life Goes On incident things inevitably got worse after I happened to watch The Other Sister(go to about the 2 minute mark in the clip). Some exec smelled Oscar when she read the script and saw the part about the two of them reading The Joy of Sex while planning a session of steamy, hot, love making, with a few misplaced chromosomes.

I know that Juliette Lewis and Giovanni Ribisi are not actually ‘tards (just Scientologists), but the idea of those two intentionally acting retarded and consequently having sex in a "drama"...just send the Academy a check. It would be more dignified than this kind of schlocky pandering for industry recognition. [Editor’s Note: I haven’t actually seen I Am Sam, but from what I gather in this clip, retarded Sean Penn is caught banging a (possibly retarded?) hooker.] I’m not saying we don’t need retards in films, I’m just asking for some discretion. I once had to suffer through an episode of Law & Order where the parents of some retards were trying to get them fixed like they were insubordinate animals because all they wanted to do was screw.

On a personal note, every time I run into my friend’s mentally challenged Aunt, I feel like a pervert because I immediately imagine her humping Corky from Life Goes On. XO, Sabrina C.

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