Interview with our future selves.
Roger learns all the compound movements, the base of any good training regiment. RIGHT?! But he also learns–finally–that you can’t get ripped in like a week. (His training montage decidedly DOES NOT look like a Rocky montage)
So Roger decides to juice for reals. EXCEPT HE TAKES ALL HIS ‘ROIDS AT ONCE…which gives him the need to effing kill.
Who paid the cops to beat up Tequila? Willie leads the investigation!
I see drunk people.
Best way to take ‘roids: MIXING THEM WITH ICE CREAM. He also starts training hard. But then he learns a lesson about not believing everything you see and read on the internet. Because you could end up with pee on your face.
Tequila discovers that the store next door has turned into a store full of vending
machines.
Meet Murphy…lover of white women.
Roger learns the hard way that bodybuilding message board comments are impossible to understand, and are THE WORST.
He also starts to delve into the secret homoerotic-ness behind male fitness and how scared bodybuilders are of seeming gay. But wait…don’t ripped men love looking at other ripped men? YES. #nohomo.
The sacred realm of virginity.
Drunk: The Musical. Subscribe! http://
Purple drank “explained” by a grumpy old man!
Roger meets Terry, an insanely ripped trainer that obviously is hiding horrible, terrible, AWFUL anger issues–like, really really bad anger issues–like HOLY SHIT, dude–most likely due to both ‘roids usage and trying to hide his gay-ness from the insanely homophobic body-building world. Roger and Terry don’t hit it off so well, especially when it is revealed that Roger knows Tred. AND SO DOES TERRY.
Blowjob Mystique.
To Sobriety & Beyond.